Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Om

I stood in front of the bathroom mirror, hands symetrically placed together Japanese style as if I were ready to acknowledge my own reflection. My hair was in the usual late evening disheveled pigtail mess.

"OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHMMMMMMM", I said to myself as SF looked on in wonderment as the sound vibrated off the stone. It was comforting. I was finally feeling the first full days side effects gentley wearing off. My headache was gone. Looking at myself I already began to think I looked better, skin clearer, eyes brighter. Awakening.

It was such a nice progression since a few hours earlier I was pawing at SF's microwaved Amy's Chicagoburger, contemplating the idea of 'fuck it'.

"If you started fasting, I really wouldn't stop it over this because it sucks," my mother said, as I turned away and shoved a gummy piece in my mouth and immediately spit it out. I never microwave anything and it was sick, SICK! I was crabby like a patty.

Easy for her to say, she was eating. The food smelled so good, the aroma of carmelized onions wafting through the air, intermingled with their real burgers frying. A beautiful bowl of organic romaine with shreds of carrot, white onion and a little cheddar sat on the counter wooing me with it's freshness and color.

Although I had never seen such beautiful canned corn and frozen peas, in that moment my resolve strengthened and I knew I could complete my journey.

13 comments:

j said...

How long are you fasting? Why? Need the info...I fasted for 3 days once. I don't reccomend it, unless it gets you out of writing a paper on hunger, which is why I did it...we could either write about it, or FEEL it. :) My laziness knows no bounds.

Dino said...

I fast each year for 7 days. I am not sure why your doing it, but mine is a concern for colon health. I think it is a spiritual thing, and I love it. After the third day a real sense of calm come over me. and I love it. Just something to consider.

My fast is a fast in conjuction with a colon treatment. The body generates a massive amount of waste, and it needs to be processed out, and given the construction, sometimes it needs help.

Now I am going going to go back and listen to ACDC

MsMamma said...

I began Sunday evening and am continuing until Saturday morn. I have done three day fasts in the past with good results. I too, believe it cleanses the body of toxins and radical bad ass cells and gives your digestive system a rest.

I also think that as Americans we generally eat too much. Most of us are so attached to abundance. For me I like to remind myself that I can live with out food for a couple of days. I also feel lucky that I have ACTUAL food to go back to. I agree with the spiritual side of it, like Dino. J-The Hunger usually disappears after 24 hours. Did you feel hungry truly?

My mom fasted with me for three days and she complained the whole time about being so hungry. We really can live off of our fat stores for quite a while(look at G-Bypass surgery where you are in fact starving your body). I do drink liquids of course, juice, tea, water etc.

I also find it empowering. Now I am going back to listening to "Death Cab for Trooby", yeah that's right, NOT for Cutie, for Trooby.

J said...

I lost my pain hunger, yes...but I also lost my energy, and had trouble functoning. The reason the teacher said three days was that the first day isn't hunger...it's appitite. By three days, you are starting to cannebalize yourself. While I agree that once in a great while, it's fine and probably can detox you, it's not something I would want to do. What do you do about the complete lack of energy? Or the blood sugar dropping so low? I don't know if I have the discipline or the desire to fast that long...

I do think the first day is the hardest, though. Days two and three were easier...not so hungry. But I found that I was losing interest in the world around me...I didn't think that was healthy.

This was when I was 18, and I'm 40 now...I wonder how different an experience it would be?

MsMamma said...

You are a tiny person, like petite and thin so it may not be good for someone of your stature. Me, I have some ample ass and thighs, so I'm not worried. My energy is very good right now. We'll see what happens past day three...

I was thinking, hmmmm, lack of sex, lack of food, I am only steps away from the convent life. Ha Ha.

J said...

I'll be interested to see how you feel around day 5 and 6....just because I've never known anyone who has fasted that long before. I'm not that tiny...carry a bit around the butt and thighs, too, but I do have small bones. I'm what I call a 'flabby size 4', meaning if I cut out the cheetos and chardonnay, I would probably be a size 2. Reading that, I guess you're right...I am small. I don't FEEL small, because I have the same body issues as most people do, and my cellulite laughs at me. :)

Anyway, did you ever read "The Mists of Avalon"? I read that years ago, and I remember the main priestess character talking about the power of fasting...seemed like there was different power to be had in different foods. They were mainly vegetarian, but sometimes would eat meat, because of the power it could give...and they sometimes fasted. I know that's a common spiritual theme, that it has a power of transendence. I didn't feel that...I just felt tired and kind of floaty. Didn't help that I worked as a waitress in a steak restaurant, though honestly by the third day the food all looked pretty gross.

Interesting stuff...you've got me thinking about all of this. Keep me up to date. :)

Dino said...

For me the program is this...I fast for seven days. I am allowed a non citrus juice to maintain a non toxic environment. I take cod liver, and alfalfa...as they are safe for the colon. Each even there is a coffee enema that is held over night. And if it is released in the morning, that is fine, if not it is not pushed.

As the enema happens you do a massage on the colon. The purpose this is to ensure penetration, and gain separation from the colon wall.

Its amazing. It is spirtual. Martin Luther wrote in his journals that he came up with the concept of his church while pooping. Pooping is amazing.

After the seventh day, you begin to reincorporate eating, in the form of broth, or what have you.

Actively eating a lot of purusing acidophilous.

Its a great time. I am a moody ass during this time. So after a while, there sort of becomes a real tunneling if you will.

MsMamma said...

J- I have never read that, I am going to look it up. Food creates mood. I believe the BIGGEST thing going into a fast is your state of mind. You weren't looking forward to it. I do think it's something you have to psych yourself for. I'm my own prime example, I was going to eat a gummy piece of veggie burger because I wasn't feeling strong about the whole thing after only 24 hours.

It was weird, as soon as I picked it up and moved it towards my mouth I knew I didn't want it. It was like a little test.

I can identify with the moodiness. Today at work I just didn't feel like socializing with co-worker. He usually likes to disrupt me when I write and I just ignored him. This afternnon my smugness cleared and he said "You're in a better mood" I told him it was because of the fasting, which I know it was.

I mean, it's not his fault that I was seeing him as a talking Cold Stone Cone, heaped high and round like his chrome dome.

I asked him if he could imagine not eating or smoking for three full days and he said no way. I think I was begrudging his freedom to eat, his nonchalant attitude. That's my problem and my choice, I know.

Interesting side note about MLK. I don't think I could give myself an enema, though. I read a new article about a man found dead in a hotel bathroom. He apparently gave himself a 'wine' enema and fell over in his immediate drunkeness and hit his head a good one on the bathtub.

J said...

So I'm assuming that on normal days, you live a caffeine free life? Because I can't imagine being HUNGRY that first day, and having a caffeine headache to boot. Sigh. So many addictions... Is it hard to fast while feeding SF? My mom fasted for a month once (for weight loss, stupid doctor thought that was a smart idea), and she said she was mostly ok, but not when cooking our meals. Part of that, of course, was that a month is a LONG time, and part was that she didn't WANT to be fasting, she wanted to be eating.

shell said...

Very good of you Heidi. I think the whole fasting thing is very good. Not too long ago we, as a family did a partial fast. We were going to do the whole fast thing but then we went on a spur of the moment vacation, and that really would have been hard. During the partial fast we also refrained our minds from any form of entertainment, ie, movies, t.v., even magazines etc. That also was very refreshing, especially good for our boys.
I used to fast a lot more and I need it. I think the longest that I have gone without food was 3 days. Would like to try for more.

MsMamma said...

I have found that I am less attracted to food. I feel so good it's unbelievable. I think it's cool that your family did that, Shell. I think we are so innundated with abundance in this society that EVERYONE thinks NOT eating is SO BAD. Mind set is paramount.

We enjoy eating and we spend quite a bit of our days thinking about, preparing and cleaning up after food. Right now I have no cravings towards anything. When I look at SF eat I just think more about what is actually going into his body.

I get, "that can't be good for you" all the time. All I can say is that it's a very personal thing. I think because I have been a vegetarian for so many years(it's not ALOT, but it's seven) my body is less toxic than meatr eaters. I did not get a white coated tongue and have had few bad side effects.

I am feeling so good that I am considering extending my fast.

BTW, I do drink Naked Juice "Green Machine" twice or three times a day.

J said...

I'm glad this has gone so well for you. Very exciting. :) Renews my faith in fasting!

MsMamma said...

UPDATE:

Still feeling good and solid food free. I undertook a salt cleanse(flushed the tract) at 5pm this afternoon. Woop-a! Two teaspoons of sea salt w/ a quart of water, drink it down and wait. I took SF to TJ Maxx around 7pm and yeah, began to feel the need to get home. I made it and wow, unbelievable. I haven't decided if I am going to end tommorrow or not. My sleep has been so satisfying and it's very strange how I am actually thinking about what I'm not planning on putting into my body once I begin eating again.

If I would eat, what I'm wanting badly is fruit, like watermelon, honeydew, pineapple, strawberries. If I don't stop fasting, my goal end date is next weekend. We'll see. This has been a really great experience so far, minus my moody day last Wednesday at work.