Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Boodalee = Boodiful

It is a dark and rainy Halloween morning here in the middle of North Central Wisconsin, far, far away from the nearest Design Within Reach. Can you imagine my total shock and surprise when I got to work and read my email?

Normally it's the usual horoscopes and the Salon newsletter. Today was different. There amongst the mundane was an email from Mod Mom! It was a quick note informing me that I was one of her incredible contest winners! ModMom has the best contests! You should really check her out!

This time Snowflake is the lucky recipient of a Boodalee duvet and sheet set! It is so BEYOND hip and cute! I seriously considered getting the 'full' size set in case I wanted to downsize my queensize, but I didn't. I cannot be so greedy and selfish. This print just totally rocks! It has the Taj Mahal, the Eiffel Tower and the Pyramids just to name a few cool icons on it!

Now I can't wait to find the perfect twin size bed to put these gorgeous threads on! Thanks Mom Mom and Boodalee! Happy Halloween!

Kitten Love




Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Bat Grrl

bat girl

Small Signs

Yesterday I was catching up at ModMom and noticed you could win free method home products. I LOVE method home. I use so much of their stuff, I was psyched to see that I would be able to get a cool free bag just for purchasing my favorite daily cleaning products!

But wait, there's more!

As I was wandering around Target getting my stuff, my phone rang. My red Motorola Razor. It said "private call". I wasn't gonna answer it but my mammy was with me and she commanded be to accept the call. Maybe you know how she feels about cellphones.

So I answered it. The news is that one of my photos is being considered for the 2009 calendar of a very big organization. It is a honor to even be considered. I'm super psyched! It made my month in year full of shit. Yay me!

Monday, October 29, 2007

The Time is Near

Well, the date looms... December 1, 2007 I will be jobless. I really don't know what I'm going to do with myself. I hate being forced into action, into doing something that I don't fucking want to do because I have no other choice. The reality is I have no other income than my job, no monies from people no longer in my life. This is for the best, I know.

Even though I asked for the information, I really do not want to be a paralegal, a nurse, a radiographer or a dental hygienist*. Fuck. Fuckity fuck. The reality is I have to pay bills and take care of a little boy alone. I hate this fucking place.

*or an aesthetician either. I forgot that one.

Drats! Foiled Again!

I didn't want to jinx myself by telling the world that I actually sold one of my pieces to a stranger until it ACTUALLY happend. Well, it happened. On Friday I met a lovely woman who had picked up one of my cards from the Exhibitour and in exchange for ONEHUNDREDANDFIFTEENBIGONES, she aquired a cool brushed steel frame encapsulating a photo of a Studebaker. I was so thrilled. I haven't cashed the check.

I thought about what I would do with it all weekend. Buy a new toaster, buy a new toaster, it chanted. Then upon looking into Snowflake's cute little gob, I discovered what I think appears to be a cavity. DRATS!

This morning I called a new lady dentist(per SF's request) and set up the initial appointment that will cost me possibly TWOHUNDREDANDONEBIGFATFUCKINGONES. Cash paid in full at the time of services. Only then will he go back for a cleaning(FOURTYEIGHTLITTLEFUCKINGONES) and finally the restorative services which will most likely bankrupt me. Anyone wanna buy a gently used Saab 9-3?

Saturday, October 27, 2007

S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y Night

While the world marches on, you with your lover, your husband, your wife, your friends- the weirdos and antisocial neglected sit around on a Saturday night and sip mediocre red wine and troll eBay for Dualit toasters, and then imported beer tshirts for their fathers for Christmas(even though he only drinks Budweiser) and finally end up bidding on a Leinenkugel's canoe paddle made out of plastic.

I keep on dancin' to the rock and roll...

Friday, October 26, 2007

10-20-30 Virus

I found this at the very Uber Kick Ass, Autumn's Mom. What were you doing 10, 20 and 30 years ago? I can't believe I can actually go back thirty years. Ugh.

10 years ago I was most likely dating this guy. I was probably also going on a trip to Mexico shortly. I partied. I was a crazy single girl enjoying everything life threw at me.

20 years ago I was attending the local University and chomping at the bit to get to the university that I really wanted to go to. I was on the tennis team and I was partying with the locals. And studying.

30 years ago I was eight years old and living in a very small town close to an indian reservation. It was the year I won a poetry contest. I liked to ice skate. I went to a school named Olga Brener. I had two younger brothers. Now I only have one.


Wednesday, October 24, 2007


Do you toast? Do you like toast? Do you have a toaster that you're fond of? Maybe you prefer a toaster oven for its versatility.

I'm sad. I was heating up some pancakes in my Michael Graves extra wide four slot toaster and the friggin' handle busted off as I plunged it down and went scuttleing across the floor. Damn! Double Damn.

It is such a cool toaster and they don't make it anymore. It's all chrome and ribbed. Maybe I could see this as the excuse to buy the toaster of my dreams. I'm not sure if I'm mentally ready to put down upwards of $200 for my Dreamy red or classic chrome(I can't decide) Dualit toaster. They're clunky and chunky and cool.

The toaster is the only 'thing' I have on my counter tops.

I do own a gorgeous Sunbeam T-9 toaster, but it needs to be refurbished. The little jewel glows as it works. I sucked the life out of it. I bought it at an antique store in Oklahoma on Route 66. It belonged to a married couple of 70 years!

Isn't it nice to share toast with someone you love?

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

He's All Thumbs

Some of you may remember this. The saga continues. Last night we're in the car on the way to din-din:

Snowflake: Pick your nose once! (Once added to the end of a sentence is a common practice in these parts, most commonly heard as 'can you come here once?)

Me: Glancing in the rearview I exclaim, "No WAY!"

Snowflake: Why? Are your thumbs too big?

Monday, October 22, 2007

Isn't It Weird

What you can find in just a hop, skip and a jump from your city?

Snowflake takes in the Dells of the EC.

A Fantastic Face...he should be on a playing card.

Someone's Utopia, yah der! Sure is a purty sign ya got der.

Gorgeous lonely country tree.

Abandoned structure with beautiful patina.

Who looked out these windows one winter?

tree two
Another beautiful 'deciduan.'

Haunted House/Trailer out in BFE...ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK!

Sunday, October 21, 2007


I watched "Amelie" for the first time yesterday, lounging on my parents sofa. Snowflake helped them blow leaves and I was able to watch the entire film uninterrupted. I loved it. It's one of my favorite films. I also liked "Delicatessen" so maybe it's no wonder. Feeling sick, I'm not sure if I should have felt overjoyed or just more depressed. Kick ass little treasure.

Amelie, you're my hero.

Friday, October 19, 2007

Friday Cock Blogging

Say hi to little Roddy Stewart.
If only my hair could look half as good.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

A Horse Named Butter



My Names

I found this at Nina's place. Because my innards are gelatinous goo and I can't seem to focus, why not meme again?

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & first car) - Snoopy Mustang II

2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie)- Coffee Macaroon

3. YOUR “FLY Guy/Girl” NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name) - H GAR

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal) - Charcoal Rhinocerous

5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first) -GARHE

6. SUPERHERO NAME: (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink) - The Green Spotted Cow or The Green Margarita

7. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers) - Eddie Ernie

8. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter) - Miller Matamoros

9. SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, favorite flower)- Autumn Calla

10. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”) - Strawberry Keensy

11. HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree)- Agua Sugar Maple

12. YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”) - The Masturbation Thunder Tour

13. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born) Jo Milwaukee

14. WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names ) Rae Edward


Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Stone Cold Cuteness

We just got back from "Family Stone Soup Night." Snowflake and I basically did some 'work' and skipped the soup. He was too excited to show me all of the different things he likes to do.

As he sat and pounded golf tees into a small pumpkin, his friend came by.

"Adana, have you met my mother," he chirps.

OMG. Be still my beating heart!

Lars and the Real Girl

I found Lars and the Real Girl via Dino and just watched the trailer.

“It’s not like you’re all one thing or another. There’s still a kid inside you. You grow up when you decide to do right. And not just what’s right for you but what’s right for everybody, even when it hurts,” made me cry.


I don't think there is a time that I feel more alone than when I'm sick. I've been sick since the weekend of September 22 and finally, the fog is starting to clear. I can feel the poison squidging out of me. I became very close to the Mucinex Boys. Snowflake and I have shared this disgusting cough that sounds like we're hard core Lucky Strike smokers. I'm not the type to run quick to the doctor for every little sniffle.

In fact, I hate going to the doctor and I hate hospitals. I hate the way they smell. I like to think that we are more like dogs than we know. Our bodies are designed to fight off infection and if we over medicate, it ultimately will ruin us(are you going to slap me, Nutrix?). I don't believe in the flu shot. In my own little world of conspiracy thought, I think the population is a testing ground for the government.

It scares me to hear of staph infections bordering on flesh eating bacterias lurking in schools and other places we generally think of as sanitary. They say people don't use proper hand washing techniques. Why? Why can't people just wash their damn hands after they cough up a phlegm wad or wipe their ass? Is it too much too ask? Apparently so.

So I've spent the last month feeling generally depressed and sad and sick. It really does make you appreciate your body when it feels 'good.' Normal. Even on a bad day.

This sickness has given me the opportunity to watch every Harry Potter movie that's been released. I like them. I love the fact that they're chocked full of great English actors that can REALLY act. Kenneth Brannaugh as Guilderoy Lockheart is hilarious. And I've always had a thing for Alan Rickman. I think if I were younger, I would have read the books. I think that will be something Snowflake and I do together.

Last night I watched "The Holiday." Yeah, I bawled. I could so relate to Kate Winslet bundled up walking around in her house with a scarf on. Bawling. Feeling lonely. The difference being she didn't have a three year old monkey saying "Hold my legs so I can hang upside down" constantly.

Rosalie stopped by yesterday and brought me a tooth pick holder from Puerto Vallarta. It's a little sombrero clad figure laying on its tummy. It's made out of Fimo and you stick the toothpicks in its ass.

It wasn't chicken soup but it was just as good.

Monday, October 15, 2007

Weird Like Us

Everyone’s a little weird meme. Not me though. I am not weird. Okay, maybe. Quite a lot.
Curiosity Killa tagged me with this one. Grab a cup of coffee or a Duck Island Oatmeal Stout, it’s a long one.

1. What kind of SOAP is in your bathtub right now? Method Currant Shower Gel and some italian tomato shower gel.

2. Do you have any watermelon in your refrigerator? No, no melons whatsoever.

3. What would you change about your living room? New windows. I live in a house of Swiss Cheese like insulation.

4. Are the dishes in your dishwasher clean or dirty? I'm the friggin' dishwasher unless I want Snowflake to flood the kitchen in his enthusiastic attempt. I do them ASAP. 7:15 AM this morning. I despise dirty dishes floundering in the sink. AND if they are in the sink, they are completely scrubbed off. waiting to be washed.

5. What is in your fridge? Longhorn Colby Cheese, various hot sauces and salsas, strawberries, organic grape tomatoes, ketchup(SF's fave condiment), Jose Cuervo Gold Margarita, Mr. T's Margarita mix, juice boxes, shall I go on?

6. White or wheat bread? Whole wheat.

7. What is on top of your refrigerator? A giant ceramic goose from Italy, a cake plate, Tostitos, four different squash, an iDog, two bottles of wine, a candle snuffer...

8. What color or design is on your shower curtain? I don't have a shower. I have this tub.

9. How many plants are in your home? I have about ten cacti in the basement wintering.

10. Is your bed made right now? No, but SF's is.

11. Comet or Soft Scrub? I don't believe in abrasives.

12. Is your closet organized? I can find things easily, yes.

13. Can you describe your flashlight? It looks like a stainless steel dildo. You can see a photo of it here.

14. Do you drink out of glass or plastic most of the time at home? Usually aluminum.

15. Do you have iced tea made in a pitcher right now? Hell no. I bought a bag of Raspberry Iced Tea last Spring and it's still not opened.

16. If you have a garage, is it cluttered? It houses an assortment of treasures in a semi organized way.

17. Curtains or blinds? Roman shades.

18. How many pillows do you sleep with? 1

19. Do you sleep with any lights on at night? No way.

20. How often do you vacuum? As needed, usually every day or every other with a Shop Vac.

21. Standard toothbrush or electric? 'Lectric all the way, baby.

22. What color is your toothbrush? White and turbocharged.

23. Do you have a welcome mat on your front porch? We don't use the front door. There is cedar mat at the back.

24. What is in your oven right now? Pots and pans.

25. Is there anything under your bed? Nope. My bed is on the floor.

26. Chore you hate doing the most? Laundry, laundry laundry.

27. What retro items are in your home? Ford Gumball Machine w/ a Kiwanis ad on the top, old bass drum from a vintage kids drum set. It says "Hep Cats." A Pewabic vase. An Art Deco Cabinet.

28. Do you have a separate room that you use as an office? No.

29. How many mirrors are in your home? Two.

30. Do you have any hidden emergency money around your home? Yes, about $2.83 in SF's piggy bank.

31. What color are your walls? In different rooms, I've used yellow, taupe, blue green, gray.

32. Do you keep any kind of protection weapons in your home? An old baseball bat I found in my granny's house after she died. But it's in SF's room. And I don't have anymore condoms either.

33. What does your home smell like right now? It usually smells apple-y or spicey.

34. Favorite candle scent? Chocolate patchouli.

35. What kind of pickles (if any) are in your refrigerator right now? Milwaukee Midgets.

36. What color is your favorite Bible? Jesus, are you serious?

37. Ever been on your roof? Yep. I've done all kinds of things up there)flat space btwn the house and the garage)

38. Do you own a stereo? A have a SoundDock and a Wave.

39. How many TVs do you have? Two. The showpiece is a gigantic 20" Sony from 1991.

40. How many house phones? Four handsets.

41. Do you have a housekeeper? Yeah, her name is Heidi.

42. What style do you decorate in? An eclectic mix of pop-toddler and kitsch.

43. Do you like solid colors in furniture or prints? Leather is essential with little pigs(ie- three year olds).

44. Is there a smoke detector in your home? Yeah, two.

45. In case of fire, what are the items in your house which you’d grab if you only could make one quick trip? SF and the Dogs of course. Nothing else really matters.

I'm going to tag Eric because well, I think he's a little weird and I find that intriguing. GlamGranola because she's the classiest Big Bad Mamma Bear I know, but she's got her "isms" and Rachel because she owns a hedgehog(and that's different). Anyone else wanna disclose their very personal refridge contents or whatever, plaese do so and comment. I'd love to read your answers.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

Smashing Pumpkins (An Epic Tale)

Always in search of adventure, Snowflake and I jumped in our lovable GasPig and ventured to the Nekoosa Giant Pumpkin Festival to take in all of its glory and bizarre ritual.

Pumpkin on Pumpkin Action

Patiently waiting for the Big Event

The "Technical Crew" readies the object of affection.

Dum Dum Di-Dum Da Da Da Da Da Da Dum...

That's over 1100lbs. of Pumpkin Lovin' Free Fallin'

smash 1
Alas, Poor Yorick,

We didn't know ye.

In a bizarre frenzy, young and old dash into the field
to stake a claim on a chunk of orange, or maybe a seed.

Exactly who got their meaty little paws
on this piece remains a mystery.
The surge- It felt like General Admission to Van Halen
circa 1980.

One of the few Girl Go Getters

trophy 1
"Donchu even think about taking this piece of pumpkin, lady!"

trophy 2
This little fella gave Snowflake a Ziploc for seeds that never materialized.
He was all to proud to pose with his trophy.

trophy 3
Now what the fvck you gonna do with that, little dude?

trophy 5
Of course! Compare size with your buddies.

trophy 4
Or pose with your sis.
You've gotta admire a girl with
grass stains on her knees
diving for a chunk of punk.

Friday, October 05, 2007

Thursday, October 04, 2007

Wednesday, October 03, 2007


You don't need to comment on how I say I love.
Or how I am so alone, but strong.
I have lived alone so long
That when I read the pangs of those more connected
I think
They'll be fine
I always am.

The one connection I treasure
I fear
A tragedy
Would render me helpless
And completely suicidal.
I'm not
As Strong
As I think I am.

Shh...Just Sometimes*

Have you ever felt like Christopher McCandless?

*I'm borrowing your line.

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

My Dandy Lion

Now with more Punk Rock!

Monday, October 01, 2007

Dear Googler

Some pathetic poor soul found my blog via this heart-rendering inquiry-


You think?

I hope not, but just in case, take three shots of Yukon Jack and Google me in the morning.

Say Hello to My Little Friend