Thursday, September 25, 2008

eyes have it

On Sunday, SF and I found these adroable bambinos penned up by the side of the road. He didn't have to convince me to stop. Damn, they were cute. These are the babes chocolate milk will come from. They were so sweet I wanted to gobble them right up, but not in a Sizzler kind of way, you know. Total cuteness.




Wednesday, September 24, 2008

about Bob

I found this student art project in pieces in the dumpster by the university art dept. this past spring. I thought, COOL! outdoor sculpture. Constructed of grocery store bouncy balls, Plaster of Paris and gauze, the creature was painted the color of Kraft macaroni and cheese powder. Well, after 11 rolls of duct tape I wasn't as enthusiastic. SF enjoyed riding his creature in the backyard all summer. I decided it would be a good idea get rid of it before it decayed through the winter and became a 300lb mess in the spring.


My friend helped me haul it to the curb and just then, the neighbors across the street came home and their little boy came over.

"Where did you get that?" he asked.

"Out of the dumpster at the UW."

"Why would you go in a dumpster? What is it?"

"It's a creature."

"What do you call it?"

"Why don't you name it?"(Ahhhh! Now I recall SF called this "strawberry")

"How about Bob?"

"Sounds good."

The next morning when SF woke up he said, "I have to check and see if Bob is still there"...patter, patter, patter..."Mommy! He's still there. He must be meant to be ours!"

Around lunchtime I received a text saying a Jeep full of hysterically laughing hospital workers picked him up. They were laughing so hard they couldn't speak but got enough out to say it was for a prank. Off he goes in a car full of chicks.

Bon voyage, Bob and Happy Trails!

Friday, September 19, 2008


About dot com says this about yellow:

Yellow is sunshine. It is a warm color that, like red, has conflicting symbolism. On the one hand it denotes happiness and joy but on the other hand yellow is the color of cowardice and deceit.

I've calmed down since this morning's hellacious beginning. Can you remember the tale of the pissboy? Well, he's back. And I'm pissed. Really, don't laugh.

Last night I made SF go upstairs for a timeout. I didn't think anything of it. This morning after feeling all shower clean and refreshed I picked up one of my favorite t's off of the a really cool old, dear to my heart retro chair(it was blue velvet woodgrain) in my bedroom only to find it mysteriously wet. Even more mysterious was that what was laying on top of it was dry. Hmm...

I figured it out fast with a quick sniff. The little shit peed all over my chair last night because I sent him upstairs for a timeout! ARGH! But even more devious was the fact that he lifted clothes up and sprayed beneath them to hide his sinister purposeful bathroom break. WTF.

I hauled the chair to the curb. When I came back in the house, Charlie had peed on the floor because I didn't let him out first(I was mad, but I can handle MY mistake for not letting an old dog out soon enough). The pissboy? I'm thinking of crating him.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008


I just got a call from an organization that is going to use one of my images for their 2009 calendar! It's distributed state wide. Whoo hooo!!!

for you
It's this one, Dot!

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Orville + Bear Update

I'm sitting here in this time capsule of a library(circa 1950) and my cell rings, LOUD. I forgot to shut it off and I'm fumbling. I accidentally hit speaker phone and then voice commands. "say a comand" BEEP "say a command" BEEP

I looked up the number via goog and here it was the man I took that crazy cute photo of with his dog. I walked out of the library and called him.

He thanked me and said he just loved them. I told him if he wanted more, just to call(I gave him 15 4" x 6" prints). He couldn't believe how nice they were because it was so misty out. He said he had enough for his Christmas cards. I melted.

I walked back into the library with a smile on my face as if were in love, floating back to this spot and its Computer Hardware Fundamentals drudgery. I'm still smiling though.

gross out

Lately, in my spare time random day dream blips, I find my mind wandering towards thoughts of dental floss and chicken wings. I've been obsessing, really. It blows my mind to think about the millions of chickens slaughtered everyday. Then I think of their clipped wings. The billions and billions of wings severed for people who never give a second thought to what they're eating other than if it comes with free celery. Gross.

Thankfully I haven't had to floss any chicken meat out of my teeth in almost a decade. Floss. I'm a hardcore flosser. I have to floss at least two times a day. I used to think nothing of throwing strand after strand of floss down the toilet. Thinking about how much floss I've already used and discarded down the drain, I wondered where does it end up? Are ducks getting twined up in fish line floss and succumbing to their deaths? And wouldn't it be disgusting to go swimming and end up with a piece of floss in your hair or mouth? Worse if it came out of the faucet. I decided not to flush it anymore.

It's probably no better to throw it in the garbage where five years from now, some raccoon will choke on it at some landfill or a baby bird gets it wrapped around its wing and can't fly. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it's highly biodegradable. Gag me.

Monday, September 15, 2008

a simple respite from html hell

I spent the entire day working on this weeks html assignment concerning *tables*. OMG. After staring at the same fricking lines and doing the same things over and over with them NOT working, it somehow all came magically together. I was ready to puke when the lightbulb burst in my head and the mystical sea of knowledge spilled forth causing a serious urge for booze. If i still smoked, I would have had a Marb.

Instead, I went home.

When I walked in the door, my Darling Dearest greeted me with:

"Mommy! You look so cute today!" (he didn't see me this morning before I left for school as he stayed at his g-padres)

The tension lifted as he gave me one of his fabulous monkey hugs. What a good day, indeed.

Friday, September 12, 2008

the kindness of strangers

On my way home from class last night I saw a little old man walking his dog in the rain. As I drove by, I saw him smile at a female passerby as he crossed a beauty salon parking lot. I felt I had to go around the block and approach him.

Pulling up along the sidewalk I sprang out of my car and said,"Excuse me. sir? Could I take your photo with your dog? I'd have some prints made for you. I saw the two of you and thought it was so adorable how you were taking your dog for a walk."

"I suppose you could" he smiled and continued, "I shouldn't have taken her out in the rain."

She was sopped, but happy and spunky. I told him it looked like she was enjoying herself. I asked him his name and address. "What's your dog's name?"

He paused, under his breath he murmured, "oh, what do we call her..." He took a few seconds and said "Bear".

I went back and grabbed my camera and snapped three quick shots. I gave him my card and thanked him again. I got a kiss from the dog. Getting back in my car I watched them disappear slowly up the incline of the sidewalk in the misty drizzle. Bear sat down for the journey home. His smile was so warm, exuding kindness and gentleness. I'm so happy I went back for that moment.

Orville and Bear

Bear at the helm

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Monday, September 08, 2008


sf: can i have some 50/50?

me: no, we're not having any pizza.

time passes, i have a few glasses of wine after dinner

SF: can i have some 50/50? (cuddling)

me: well i suppose.(big monkey hug + smiles + kisses = feeling the toddler-squishey-chipmonk voice LOVE)

SF: hey, why are you letting me have 50/50?

me, glowing and warm, fuzzy, but real: because i'm being lenient.

SF: no, i think it's because you're being niiiiiccccce.(BIG HUG)

and i bust out laughing. SF too.


a funny thing happened when i got home from school on friday... some of you may already know because you're my friend and SF's nanny. or you may know because i called you. you could know because i stopped by. or maybe it was just a simple shout-out on facebook.

in any case, i was completely stunned when i got home from school to find a check from a gallery that is host to a national show. one of my framed prints sold for $1400. can i take the liberty of rounding up from $1366? i've been walking on sunshine ever since. i can't bring myself to deposit it just yet. i like to look at it. and since i'm prone to spending disposable income on things like keens and botox, i think i'll just hang on to it for a while.

-signed the 'arteest' formerly known as msmamma

Friday, September 05, 2008

under the milkyway tonight

last weekend i hung out on the roof of my parents boat house. my mom bought my dad a meade telescope and for years it sat unopened in their basement. apparently i was the anointed telescope erector. i can get really, really feisty when it comes to getting things like this put together. i had to mount and remount a few times before i realized i just had to pull down really hard to get to zero degrees. fvck.

once together i put it down on the boathouse roof and scanned the shoreline. i could see people's faces so cleary, if i knew WHO they were, i'd know them. leave my wandering eye to find a dude halfway across the lake whipping it out and watering the flowers. seriously, i think i could have counted his pubes one by one.

my last night there my mom and i sat and drank wine and looked at the stars with a blustering wind flowing through the night that only meant summer was over. looking up at the stars i felt chilled and invigorated and small but strong. each little star hanging its twinkling calling card out in the night for anyone anywhere to see like neon signs across the galaxy. we were here they said. we are here i answered.

Tuesday, September 02, 2008


The seamonster emerges, crabby

falling right out of the faucet into the warm bubbling pool,
as the naked nymph stands guard.

Water makes him happy.

He thanks the spirits in his own way

loving the aqueous and ephemeral
even though he doesn't know it yet.