Thursday, November 08, 2007

It's Not Easy Being

When I picked Snowflake up from Montessori this afternoon, I was met by Miss L., a woman probably my mother's age. She looked at me sternly and said,

"Someone needs to work on not calling his classmates names."

Oh, fuck.

"Yes," I said, we've been having that problem and I don't know what to do" and I walked away with Snowflake in my arms.

The past few weeks he has had a passion for poop, stupid, crotch and piss. I honestly have no idea where he is getting them from because I don't say them. I almost died when I heard him say dummy yesterday.

I make things up like 'holy kananga birds' and 'son of a beandip' and let me not forget 'weiner bird.' I feel awful about it. I send him to bed early many nights because he's exhausted from not taking a nap and he calls me the 's' word- STUPID. I won't take it. I also tell him that he's hurting peoples feelings and that the kids won't like him if he keeps calling them names.

Tuesday was his parent teacher conference(the week before one of his teachers mentioned the word stupid was spreading like wildfire, so at least I know where one thing came from) and it was positive except for the fact that he likes to call his classmates strange things and see what kind of reaction he gets. The latest? Stinkhead.

All I do is tell him that certain words are not acceptable in this house. But he does it anyway. I felt so bad today after I picked him up. Tonight was father/son night. My parents are in Mexico so gramps couldn't take him.

I asked my brother, but his brain is like fresh tar in August. He said he'd do it, but he basically forgot about it so I told him not to bother.

Snowflake and I were sitting on the couch tonight and he was talking about father/son night and I told him he wouldn't be going. God! Even as I plunk the words out now, my nose stuffs up and I can barely see.

"But mom, I want you to take me to Father/Son night!"

"I'm not your dad, though," I say quietly.

"I don't care, I want you to take me," he says as I cuddle him in my arms and he falls asleep.



(heart breaks into a million tiny pieces)

I need glue.