Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Mudder's Night Out

Two nights in a row I've gotten lucky. Dear ol' Snowflake has fallen asleep on the way home from the office. I take him with me to work like a conjoined twin. I feel like these rare nights are my meager rewards. Peace. Alone. At night. I rented four movies. I felt like I was going to Mexico for Spring Break. It was Calgonesque. Martin Luther always pops into my head at these moments saying, "Free at last! Free at last! Great God Almighty free at last!"

Part of me just wants to go to bed. Another part is totally Spicoli with the bonus.

It's strange when I think about my own parents, how parentlike they were. They seemed so together. So adult. They really weren't. They had kids for the sake of having them. Like it was just what you did after you got married. I don't feel like that. I know that I am so much more of an intuitive and involved person who takes parenting as a second full time job seriously. I don't feel like a Card Carrying Adult.

Most people grow up, move away and see their parents once or twice a year. Not me. I have an old polish curse upon me and part of the umbilical cord is still attached(hanging on by a thread). Coincidentally, Snowflake is making his th's into d's lately so he sounds like a peasant from the Old Country. I love to tell him to call me Mother.

"I love you Mudder. Can I have some ice cream Mudder? Let's go over dare Mudder," he chirps. It's like having my own little Bela Lugosi. No, he doesn't say turd for third, thank goodness.

I never imagined myself like this- the single parent, living for the rare night alone so I can watch movies instead of Pee Wee's Playhouse. I have learned to appreciate these small gifts. Especially when they are combined with a nice bottle of red wine.