Sunday, October 15, 2006

Spilt

It has been a few years since I had grapes to harvest. When I reroofed the house four years ago, I had to cut the vine way back. Last year I had a small batch that I cooked down into jam because it was the last time my sweet blackberry boy pug ate them. He was like a truffle sniffing hog in the fall. Morbid, but I still have four little jars stashed in my cupboard. I will probably always keep them. This year was a bounty. Beautiful dark violet blue orbs hung thickly twisted around the old vine. The aroma hung in the air from twenty feet away. Grapey grape.

Last Monday I took the bunches, cutting them with my micro Leatherman with precision, leaving a few hanging for the winter creatures. A sweet treat in a barren landscape. The next day I hauled them all up to my parents house. We washed and destemmed them, cooked them, mashed them, strained them.

Back into the pot they went along with sugar. I was making jam. I have never used pectin or gelatin. This year I thought I would try using turbinado sugar(sugar in the raw). I cooked it and cooked it and cooked it. After sealing 36 jars, I had to run to the store and buy 24 more.

My cute first little 36 jars remained a syrup. Bah. All of that work for nothing. The other 19 jars(the ones I went to the store for) are nice and jam-like. It seems nothing like the jam I made before the vine was ever trimmed back for construction.

Tonight I brought the batch home and opened up each jar with a pop, letting it pool in the sink as if it were my own blood. There was so much and I did feel sad. Sad to see all of that growth, that life going right down the drain.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

That's a sad lesson to learn, but I'm glad you got the jam that gelled...nice. :)

Anonymous said...

You should have tried some of the not so perfect jam as syrup. I bet it would have been delish on some perfect pancakes! I love that first picture, the colors are amazing!

Anonymous said...

mama, i have to say. i am so moved by your kind gesture for the winter creatures.

your little bambino will learn such loving lessons from you, just by observing you.

Anonymous said...

Yes J, at least some was salvageable so YAY for that.

I thought about the syrup idea, Glam. Then I thought, uh, screw it. I was disgusted with the work that went into it.

Melissa- That is the nicest thing anyone has said tome in a very long time. Thank you. I've been so at odds with Snowflake. I can't seem to do anything right. We left Kindermusik class last night and I was almost in tears. I know it's just a stage, but it is mind blowingly difficult at times. If you have any advice, send it over.

In fact, I've been so bummed out that I actually forgot to take my contacts out last night. Something that hasn't happened since I was drunk and in college. I was wandering around this morning and was mystified by how clear my vision was out the window.

So thank you again, truly. Oh, and you can call me Heidi. :)

Anonymous said...

sigh. kids are a lot harder than we think. we tend to look at the (usually crappy) job our parents did on us and go, hey man, i can do WAY better than that... and then we fall to pieces when our own little ones are acting like horrid monsters. i have stories that would drop your jaw.

i think the most important thing is to remember: a. constant love and strength in that love. b. consistency in discipline. i don't mean hitting. i mean holding your ground on certain things. and that's a toughie when you also have to c. pick your battles. big deal if he skips his naps, but EVERY night we go to bed between 8 and 9. whatever you decide is right for you, but i think that has worked best for me. be wary of phases. sometimes we think they are phases, until you go, omg, he's been doing this for about 3 yrs now. my oldest was in a phase that turned out to be something that is just part of who he is. and i accept and embrace that about him. sheesh it's tough. be zen. you're a good mommy, i can see that. it's just difficult when it's your first, and you're single, AND when you don't get a lot of good insight from friends/relatives. i had my first way before any friends/family, so i felt lost often. oops, got to rambling.. :)
good luck, Heidi.

Anonymous said...

ps. you can email me anytime. ssilem@gmail.com